Lamentations of the Soul

And the previous weeks of my life was really tragic, disaster and really a crappy one. But on the other hand, these last days, the wheel of fortune comes out to my life and blessed me with a great surprise. Without exaggeration, it seems like the real embodiment of joy happened in me and it came impulsively.

The past days and weeks of my life really gave me a panoramic view of who am I. –a worthless guy. In such instances of my life, I couldn't help but realize that I pictured myself as poppycock, balderdash, jabber, rabish and gobbledygook creature living in this planet.

I want to scream, to shout and to discharge all the things, energy and emotions on my system. I know that this things shouldn't happen. I know what is the right thing to do. I know it. I know it. I know what is right and what is wrong. But, I cannot refuse. I don't know how to say no, to decline.

I do not know what is happening to myself. One thing that I know is that I exist and painstakingly suffering the risk that I have chosen. One thing that I knew back then is that, I am suspended in the atmosphere, freely moving. And if these circumstances will linger, I would definitely deeply fall, tumble and go head over heels. The worst scenario that will really dump me.

I feel that I am helpless. I cried, but I choose that no one should see me. In which people that surrounds me will only see the "me" that is blissful, exultant. The sadness that surrounds me, kills me li'l by li'l. Until, I felt that tremendous grief, melancholic emotion.

I'm not an emo guy. And I hate to belong someday on that flock. But feelings really placed me into a place where I can not go. I am paralyzed.

But last Sunday while I am attending the Thanksgiving Session, all things turned out to be a sudden transformation. Because of the topic discussed by Bro. Eli, my spirit comes out to be delighted. I cannot explain the feeling, the emotion,that occupied myself. No words could elaborate all the thoughts that I understand on that day. Really a big and great blessing that God had given to me. It seems that on that time, on that day, on that circumstance, God speaks to me. Out from the heavens, I heard his voice. I heard HIM talking to me.

As the verses of the Bible were continually read by sis Luz and by Bro. Eli. My eyes turned to be watery. I want to cry. But I don't want. Many emotions intermingle with each other. I feel the joy in my heart. A feeling that I cannot explain. I felt God's grace on that time. I felt God's magnificent Love, and His Great Righteousness in that point of my life. I felt that the worries and pains on my heart turn to ease, turn to be healed.

I thank God because of these things that is happening to me. Know I really understand and realize how worthless I am and how Great is thy God of Israel. I know I am a sinner. A futile sinner that shouldn't be entertained by a great Master. But on that day, on that significant day. I felt His tender loving goodness and righteousness. And now I am grateful. Thanks to the Almighty God for His unspeakable gifts.

Now, I am ready to face the sinful society. And in God's grace I can do all this things with Him. I do not know what challenges would be the next. But now, I know where I fall.

Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent.

Revelation 2:5

King James Version

Thanks be to God, and to the preacher that He sent to us. Thanks be to God. Thanks be to God. 

But if the wicked will turn from all his sins that he hath committed, and keep all my statutes, and do that which is lawful and right, he shall surely live, he shall not die. Ezekiel 18:21 King James Version

All his transgressions that he hath committed, they shall not be mentioned unto him: in his righteousness that he hath done he shall live. Ezekiel 18:22 King James Version

:::Kwentong DragonFLY:::

turn edit on. edit page title. the pilgrim. basura. bura. isip.

…

pagkatapos ng tatlong tuldok na yun, wala pa rin akong na isip.

isip ule.

…

kwentong tambay

edit page title. tipa. kwentong tambay 

d pede. d namn ako tambay, adventurous nga ako dba.bura ule. basura.isip 

…

tutubi.weird.

tuldok. tuldok. tuldok. 

…

oo nga tutubi. tama.

biglang nanariwa sa aking isipan ang isa sa mga paborito kong nobela. Ang Tutubi Tutubi, Wag Kang Magpahuli Sa Mamang Salbahe. nagkatagpu kami ng nobelang ito nung nasa high school pa ako. enjoy cia basahin. isang nobela ni Jun Cruz Reyes na ginamitan nya muli ng estilong satire gaya ng kanyang maikling kwentong utos ng hari.

Tutubi, Tutubi, Wag Kang Magpahuli sa Mamang Salbahe (UP Jubilee Student Edition)
Ni Jun Cruz Reyes
University of the Philippines Press
Copyright 2004
ISBN: 971-542-448-1
5×8, 224pp

Ang Tutubi, Tutubi, 'Wag Kang Magpahuli sa Mamang Salbahe ay pagtatangka ng awtor na isalaysay ang mga unang araw ng batas militar "sa panahong hindi puwedeng sabihin nang deretso ang nasa isip." Bunga ito ng kanyang eksperimento sa paggamit ng satire upang masabi ang bawal "nang hindi makakagalitan" o sa paraang matatawa lang ang nakarinig (mula sa Paunang Salita ng may-akda). Nanalo ang nobelang ito ng grand prize sa Palanca noong 1982. Unang inilathala ng New Day Publishers noong 1987, nagkamit din ito ng National Book Award mula sa Manila Critics Circle.

kapanapanabik ang mga eksena sa bawat pahina ng nobela. d pa ako nabubuhay nung martial law. at di ko sinubukang mangarap sa mga oras na iyon na bawal kang magpagabi sa lansangan. aba di pwede Iyon ngayun ano. baka kada may function e nasa kulungan ako kinabukasan. kaya sapamamagitan ng nobelang ito e parang nakarating na rin ako sa bahaging iyon ng kasaysayan. nag ala tv show na "Bayani" na naman ako habang nag-iisip. masyadong malayo ang narating ng nobela. may paliguy liguy. 

may mga tagpong nakakatawa. ang mga karanasan nya sa kamay ng mga pulis; ang paglalakad niya sa maynila. Nang mapansin niyang CCP na ang dating bahagi ng anyong tubig. naroon ako. nang mag-isa siyang manuod ng sine. nang kumain siya nang mag-isa sa karinderia at naharas siya ng isang matandang puta. naroon din ako.  Nang ikwento nya isa-isa ang mga kaibigan niya, at nang dahil sa gutom ay kumain sila ng kangkong sa tabi ng kaibigan niya, naroon ako. nang himatayin na si Jojo dahil sa sobrang gutom, naroon ako. Sabi sa inyo may pag ka bayani program ang mga eksena e. at marami pang masasaya at malulungkot na tagpo sa nobela. Basahin nyu na lang  at tiyak maeenjoy Kayo.

well, dun ko hinugot ang bagong titulo ng blogsite kong ito.

pero may twist,

nitong umaga kase, naalimpungatan ako dahil sa balasubas kong pusa. nagising ako dahil sa likot niya sa kama ko. nagising ako, at nakita kong may kagat na tutubing kalabaw sa bibig si migs. hayop na pusa, parang di pinapakain. napaisip din ako bigla, napatigil. pinapakain ko nga ba cia? ilang sandali akong natunganga. 

sinampal kong muli ang sarili ko. sinaway ko na rin si migs habang masaya niyang pinaglalaruan ang tutubing kalabaw.

wala nang malay ang kawawang tutubi.

nag-orasyon na ako.

matapos ang ritwal, pinagmasdan ko muli si migs habang pinaglalaruang walang sawa ang tutubing wasak wasak na ang pakpak. anu nga ba naman ang laban ng pakpak niya sa matatalas na kuko ni migs. walang awang hayup laban sa walang buhay na nilalang. 

matapos ang pagninilay, napabuntong hininga ako. nasabi kong mukha rin pala akong tutubi, mahina, walang magagawa. walang magagawa kung wala ang pakpak. di makalipad,  kung walang pakpak. di makalaban kung wala ang pakpak.

di man ako maya,di man ako agila. makalilipad din ako.

di man ako monkey-eating eagle, makalilipad pa rin ako gaya ng australian hawk

di man ako si pigeotto, kaya kong lumipad gaya ni butterfree

di man ako gaya ng kalapating pinapakawalan pag may kasal, alam ko makalilipad , ako gaya ng love birds na nakalilipad pag pinapakawalan sa hawla ng makukulit na kapit-bahay namen.

pero alam ko kaya kong lumipad ng mataas, gaya ng mga pulang tutubi sa PUP na nakaaabot lampas 6th floor, mga mala mulawin.

kaya kong makalipad kahit mahina ang pakpak. basta't may tumutulong sa akin.

mararating ko ang narating ng kaibigan kong agila at maya.

kaya kong lumipad. 

Lahat ng mga bagay ay aking magagawa doon sa nagpapalakas sa akin.

Mga Taga-Filipos 4:13

Ang Dating Biblia

wag lang akong magpapahuli sa pusang salbahe. 

edit on. edit page title.

 Tutubi, Tutubi  'Wag Kang Magpahuli  sa Pusang Salbahe

Kapusungan

Death is certain but the Bible speaks about  untimely death! 

Make a personal reflection about this……

Very interesting, read until the  end…..

 It is written in the Bible (Galatians 6:7):

 "Be not deceived; God is not mocked:

 for whatsoever a man soweth,  

 that shall he also reap."

Here are some men and women who mocked God:

John Lennon  (Singer):

 Some years before, during his interview with an American Magazine, he said:  

…"Christianity will end, it will disappear. I do not have to argue about that. I am certain.

Jesus was ok, but his subjects were too simple,   Today we are more famous than Him" (1966).

Lennon, after saying that the Beatles were more famous than Jesus Christ, was shot six times.

Tancredo Neves  (President of Brazil):  

During the Presidential campaign, he said if he got 500,000 votes from his party, not even God would remove him from Presidency.

Sure he got the votes, but he got sick a day before being made President, then he died.

 Cazuza  (Bi-sexual Brazilian composer, singer and poet):

 During A show in Canecio (Rio de Janeiro), 

 …while smoking his cigarette, he puffed out some   smoke into the air and said: "God, that's for you."

 He died at the age of 32 of AIDS in a horrible manner.

The man who built the Titanic

 After the construction of Titanic, a reporter asked   him how safe the 

Titanic would be.

  …With an ironic tone he said:  "Not even God can sink it"

The  result:   I think you all know what happened to the Titanic.

Marilyn Monroe  (Actress)

She was visited by Billy Graham during a  presentation of a show.  

He said the Spirit of God had sent him to preach to her.  

After hearing what the Preacher had to say, she said:  

"I don't need your Jesus".

A week later, she was found dead in her apartment. 

Bon Scott  (Singer)      

The ex-vocalist of the AC/DC. On one of his 1979 songs he sang:  

"Don't stop me, I'm going down all the way, down   the highway to hell".

On the 19th of  February 1980, Bon Scott was   found dead, he had been choked

by his own vomit.

Campinas  (IN 2005)

 In Campinas, Brazil a group of friends, drunk,  went to pick up a friend…..

 The mother accompanied her to the car and was  so worried about the drunkenness of       her friends and she said to the daughter holding her hand,

who was already seated in the car:

"My Daughter, Go With God And

 May He Protect You…"

She responded: "Only If He (God) Travels   In The Trunk, Cause Inside Here…..   It's Already Full"

Hours later, news came by that they had been  involved in a fatal accident,

everyone had died, the car could not be recognized what type of car it had  been, but surprisingly, the trunk   was intact.

The police said there was no way the trunk could  have remained intact. To their surprise, inside the trunk was a crate of  eggs, none were broken.

Christine Hewitt (Jamaican Journalist and entertainer)

Said the Bible (Word of God) was the worst book   ever written.

In June 2006 she was found burnt beyond  recognition in her motor vehicle.

Many more important people have forgotten that  there is no other name that was given so  much authority as the name of Jesus.

Many have died, but only Jesus died and rose  again, and he is still alive.

                "Jesus"  

P.S: If it was a joke, you would have sent it to everyone.  

So are you going to have courage to send this?.

I have done my part, Jesus said 

"If you are embarrassed about me,

I will also be embarrassed about you  before my Father."